So, we are pretty brand new at these things aren’t we? They have swam over that pond from America and landed here in the UK and most of us have no idea what the etiquette is when you are a guest at a baby shower, who you buy for, what you buy, what you wear… etc etc.
Especially if you are over 40. When our babies arrived, they got a nice gift after the event, you know a set of baby grows from Ethel Austin or Marks and Spencers (if you had a posh family). Maybe a cute little outfit from Mothercare. If someone would have mentioned asking people to come around and celebrate before the birth, they would have got weird looks and some questionable remarks. Well they would have from my family, that is for sure. Disclaimer, I am from up north and we do tend to have a somewhat practical approach to life.. although I am far more hippy and universe led than my blood relatives I have to say.
To be honest, on a personal level, considering I literally looked like a beached whale when I was about to give birth, there would have been nothing further from my mind than getting dressed up and parading myself around everyone I knew. No, sloppy pj’s and slippers were the order of the day when I was preggers.. Not sure I would be any different now, but who knows?
Hey, that’s not all that is new in the baby world from when I had mine either! We now have gender reveal, baby announcements and pregnancy announcements. I actually think these are pretty cool, why not get excited about the new arrival and include people who are going to babysit, I mean love, include people who are going to love the babes.
Anyway, back to the baby showers, they are here, and here to stay and as you and I are becoming the guests of said parties, we need to know the etiquette when attending them. I did some research and as a result managed to answer some common questions.
Do you give presents at a baby shower?
Most people do tend to turn up with a small gift. You can either give a gift for the mum to be or a gift for the baby to be. That choice is up to you, but if you are intending to buy a baby gift when it is actually born, then a mum to be gift might be the answer. Don’t forget the card… for the love of God, do not forget the card, otherwise they won’t know how generous you have been.
Now might be a superb time for a shameless plug. After my research I designed a baby collection that would suit such an occasion and it covers all the baby related announcements and parties and even the main babysitters… I mean family, the main family (yano, new nanas and grandmas, new grandads and dads).
How much should I spend at a baby shower?
Looking at the research, the average amount seems to be £20 give or take a couple of squidletts. I personally think that anything upward of £15 is really generous, given that you will more than likely be giving a gift to the new babes when it makes an appearance. But, as usual this is a personal preference and if you want to splash out, you go for it.
Check your baby shower invite.
Some baby showers are childless so check your invite and if they don’t have your little ones names on, it would be a good idea to check with the host to see if it is a child friendly event. Better to check than rock up with little Johnny in tow, only to find it is very much an adult party. I am not giving an opinon on this either way, I value my life too much..
What do you wear at a baby shower?
It seems they are a very much dress up kind of event.. I mean I don’t think we are talking a day at the races or a wedding or anything, but as dressed up as dressed up can be without taking it to extremes would be a good place to start. I wouldn’t go booking a make up artist, but a bit of tan and a nice dress would be perfectly adequate.. to be on the safe side, don’t wear your joggers.
So, while I was carrying out my research, along with the ‘what you should do’ were a list of ‘what you shouldn’t do’ at a baby shower. I have written a list, but I would like to think you know yourself if you know someone well enough to discuss the points below.
Ok, So things not to do or say
Tell her how big she is (I have to say, totally agree, I knew I was a beached whale, I didn’t need reminding).
Pat her belly or suggest measuring it
Give her parenting advice
Ask her about birth plans
Do not get drunk.. I know I know, maybe that’s what the head wetting is for? Have the Americans let us keep that?
After the birth – Sip and See
This is the new one to look out for, sounds quite fun actually as it is more of an open house to visit the new baby along with everyone else, like a group welcome.
So, I hope you find this little short and sweet guide useful. If you have been to any baby showers and feel you can add anything or warn people about it, then please leave a comment.
Have fun at the next baby shower and see you next time.